Lives That Never Fade
by Leaf of Shining Moss
Summary: "I cant have friends, they'll just die. They always do." In Iceclan, rules are strict. Broken rules means harsh punishment. So no one did. Except for us. Its a gift, a curse, everyone wishes for it, but no one knows the punishment it causes. We broke the one rule no-one ever had. We broke the rule of death, but trust me, it's killing us. [Co-written with Frosted Leaf by the Bay]
1. Cloudpaw

**Hello everyone! I am _not _dead, you know who you are guys, and yet I still havent added to my other two stories, AND added another one... Points for me q.q Anyways, this is a story I wrote with Frostbite2424. Lives That Never Fade. Its a long story that we 'wrote' a long time ago :P and still are writing! We are _not _ taking OC's, but _will_ take story ideas! Well, lets start!**

I looked to Leopardclaw, more commonly known as just Leopard, who was making patrols.

"Leaf, Tasty," a grunt was made from a warrior with an unfortunate nickname, "Black, and your apprentice, Cloud. Hunting patrol. We need prey before the storm."

Me! Perfect. Meanwhile, a fluffy golden-brown she-cat, Leafnose, a tall white and orange tabby, Tastycat, whose real name was Brambletail, and a large black cat with white paws, Blackfrost stepped up.

"Come on, Black!" I pestered, "Hurry up!"

He rolled his eyes, "How many times have I told you not to call me that?"

"Seven," I guessed, "Now hurry up!"

"It's only hunting..." Bramble shrugged.

"Only hunting," Leaf shook her head, "Cloud is right. We do need to hurry up; a storm is coming."

Black sighed as he made is way up the cliff that hid the camp. I was quick to follow next. I didn't really love hunting, unlike the other apprentices, but I loved being in the forest. It was always amazing.

"Cloud, are you going to keep walking, or stop in the middle of the cliff?"

"Oh," I dipped my head, "Right,"

I quickly ran to the top, the others right behind me. My mentor shook his head at me; it wasn't the first time I stopped when coming up. I often got obsessed over the forest. It was unique, beautiful...

"Cloud?"

I jumped, "Here! What? I was just ummm… thinking…"

"Right," Leaf began slowly, "We should split up, and meet here at sunhigh,"

We all nodded. Splitting up meant more prey. However Black had other plans for me.

"Cloud can-"

"I can hunt alone." I hissed annoyed.

"But the storm-"

I hissed again in annoyance, for some reason they thought I was bad at hunting. I had some issues, but it's not like I'm handicapped. Ugh. Mousebrains.

"See you at sunhigh," I hissed, walking away.

I ran as soon as they couldn't see me. It was to the river. I don't know why. Maybe prey is there? It didn't matter anyways. I could care less. As long as I was alone, I could be happy.

I stopped as I sented a mouse. It should have heard me running, but for some reason was perfectly fine not moving, right out of view. I quickly moved so the wind would cover my scent. I leaned forward slightly, following a small trail of the scent.

Soon, a large, plump mouse came into view. It didn't even notice me as it chewed on something out of sight. I lined up my pounce perfectly. It should hit, and kill it without a sound. It was perfection. Then again, I'm me.

As I pounced I noticed it. I landed next to the mouse, a pounce that should be perfect, and missed? I sighed as the mouse ran off. My pounce was off balance. No matter what. I could only hit my target if I wasn't lined up. It was a awful.

Then the rain came. I took too long hunting _one mouse_, and I missed. I was too far away to make it back to Iceclan camp, not to mention, I had no prey. I quickly ran trying to find shelter. The ground was slippery. I fell every other step. Then I saw the cave.

It was near the river, and almost fully hidden by some rocks. For a second I feared it wasn't a cave, only a trick of the eye, but as I got closer I could tell. It was a small burrow underground. An old foxes den or something. I rushed inside and started to clean my white and grey fur. I should be safe here while the storm passes...

Then I saw it. The water line. In front of the den. It might not seem like much, but the cave is right by the river. If the river were to flood...

No. My luck wouldn't be _that_ bad. I think.

I wouldn't have much to do in the den. It's not like I can even do anything but sleep. Luckily, that seemed like a good option. So I did.

In my dream, I was trying to swim, but couldn't. It was true, I never learned how. I refused. If I just avoided water, I wouldn't need too. I was wrong. I woke up just as my head went under.

I jumped. It was a scary dream. Then I noticed my fur was wet. I thought I had cleaned it dry...

The river.

I looked at the floor of the cave to find I was right. It had started flooding. It didn't help that the den was more of a burrow and less of a cave. The water was filling up fast. The entrance blocked by said water. I was trapped.

I panicked. What if my dream... No. Someone would come, right? The water started to hit my belly. A felt faint. That's not really a good thing. Fainting would mean...

I thought of my life so far. It wasn't much. I was only seven moons. My first three moons went without really anything happening, but in my fourth... Rosekit. My sister Rose. The greencough was bad. The next two moons until being an apprentice went by slowly. Then this moon. I learned to fight, hunt, and even a bit of healing. I didn't learn how to swim.

The water is starting to get to my head. I lifted my head up in an attempt to get more air, but it wouldn't last long. The water rose. I took my last breath.

It started with the headache. My head felt like a berry. A berry that was going to explode.

Then came my vision. I started to black out. Blacking out would kill me, if I didn't die anyways."

Then the noise. The ringing in my ears. The water rushing in. The den shaking, threatening to collapse. The ringing. The water. The den. The ringing. The water. The den. The whisper.

"Sorry, brother."

* * *

One Moon Later

* * *

"Skykit, wake up!"

"Patchpaw! Calm down!"

"Yes, Silver... I'll go talk to Sand.."

There must be new kits... Patch would be excited over new kits. Where am I anyways? The medicine cat den? That's right, the flood... I must be hurt. Why is Skykit here? Is he hurt? I hope he wakes up soon. I might as well talk to Silver.

I groaned as I tried to sit up. I felt funny, but mainly my head.

"You're up!" Silveroak yelled, surprised. She was a silver tabby with short fur. Her eyes shined green at me.

"Y-yeah," I awkwardly answered, coughing.

"Echopaw! Get some moss!" Silveroak yelled into the back room. Willow must be out getting herbs. There would normally only be two medicine cats, but Echopaw had insisted, having lost her prey on the first day of battle training.

Soon a small grey tabby appeared in an opening in the wall. She looked a lot like silver, minus the amber eyes that were not in anyway green.

"Ere" she mumbled while holding the moss. She set the wet moss down next to me. I took a few nervous sips. It felt like my head would explode. My entire body just felt oddly, small.

Silveroak padded up to me, "How are you, Skykit? Or can I call you Sky? What is your name anyways... we did kind of name you..."

As Silver kept rambling, I looked behind me. Skykit? I was Cloudpaw, a seven moon old apprentice! Unless I was somehow Skykit...

I noticed Silver looking at me worriedly, "Oh, umm, Sky is fine I guess. I can't really remember much."

Silver went from worried to surprised. I guess it was the first time I talked and-

"That's fine, you are only two moons old. We found you in the forest. You were knocked out. You seemed to have wounds, so we healed them. That was yesterday. Oh! I'm Silveroak by the way, but you can just call me Silver. This is probably a lot... Sorry!"

Probably? "That's okay, Silver,"

Silver glanced out of the den. Her fur was slightly ruffled. She seemed worried, but of what I didn't know.

"I got to go, Echopaw is in the back, just shout if you need anything. Okay?"

"Okay," I nodded, watching as she left the den. I wonder what that was about. I looked out the den after her, as she climbed the cliff that was just a few fox lengths away. Right above her was the forest. The forest I had loved as an apprentice. The forest I still forest. It was calling to me.

That's when I started sneaking out.

If I hadn't I wouldn't have known...


	2. Blue

**This chapter is by Frostbite2424, recently re-uploaded after editing...**

I was running at random, I couldn't stop. I wouldn't stop. If I fell, I'd get back up. I couldn't risk him catching me. I had trusted him before, but now I can't. Where am I going? I wouldn't have a clue.

Out of the lives I lived, this is the worst. It's even worse than the first. Yes, I did mean of all the lives I've lived. I'm one of the 'special' ones, I suppose you could say. I can die, but can't at the same time. When I die, I'm not actually dying, I'm being reborn again. In this life though, I'm not going to lose anyone important to me because I don't want to meet anyone.

Suddenly my paws weren't on ground. I was falling off a mini cliff. I wouldn't die, I'd just break a few bones, maybe. I landed on some territory with a lot of trees and a big pond. There was a small cave next to the pond. So I walked in to see if there was anyone there. It didn't smell like it so I made that my home. I had a forest to hunt in and a den to sleep in, along with a pond for water.

Did I forget to mention? I have all memories from past lives, so I know how to hunt and battle. I can also treat my own wounds. I made a nest in the cave to curl up and sleep.

If he catches me, What will happen next?

I thought as I fell asleep.

Sunlight draped into the cave, shining on my face. I opened my eyes, only to realize that I have overslept. I got up and stretched my back, then walked out of the den. I layed by the river and stared into the pond. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw movement. I looked over to see a white cat with gray patches on his back. He was hunting.

Please don't see me. Please! Please! Please! Don't see me! I don't want to talk to anyone.

But just out of luck, he looked over at me. He walked over to me.

"Hi!" He meowed cheerfully.

"H-hi." I stammered while backing away.

He gave me a questioning look, but then ignored it.

"I have to go! Bye!" I darted away and into my cave.

I should leave, there might be more of them.

I woke up and saw that it was Moonhigh.

I must've fallen asleep. I should leave right now, nobody will be out.

I headed south then turned west after climbing down a cliff. I planned to go west until I reached the mountains. When I looked up, I saw a black cat with white paws, a dark brown cat and a white cat in front of me.

"This is Stormclan territory! What are you doing here?" Hissed the white tom.

"Well I was walking away from here." I responded coolly.

In this life I'm two moons, but I have about 24 moons of training!

"Idiot #27, leave her alone and this patrol!" The black tom with white paws hissed. Then he turned to me. "Come with us, we'll give you prey."

"I can hunt on my own." I growled.

"Let me rephrase that, you will come with us."

"Fine."

I was outnumbered, even though I had training, I had to take in my size. I wouldn't have the same strength as before.

I followed them back to their camp, I was afraid to around animal again. Then, I smelt him.

"What's your problem?" I heard a white tom hiss at me. It was only then that I realized was shaking.

"Fear of being around other animals, that's my problem."

I'll probably be in trouble for that smart comment later…

The black tom with white paws walked up to me.

"Welcome to your new home!" He meowed.

"I don't remember saying I wanted to live here."

Before I could react, he jumped at me and sliced my face. It stung really badly, but I couldn't afford to show pain with him around here. I just stood there, not showing any emotion.

"I am Shadow, your new leader. You will listen to me and answer any questions I have."

"Technically you aren't my new leader because I never had a leader to begin with."

"If you disobey me, I will kill you!"

"Well I wouldn't be dead for very long anyways. I've died ten times before."

"Impossible."

"Believe it or not, it happened. I have watched dozens of friends die before me. While I sat there wishing that they could do what I can do."

"Whatever. Patrols! Lightspot, Grass-strike, Embershard, and this smart kit can go on a border patrol! Let me rephrase that… They have to go on patrol."

We walked along the border, not doing anything. They don't mark the borders, they just check for anyone that they can capture. I gazed down at my paws, I heard a snarl and looked up. When I looked up, I saw that mysterious gray and white tom from before.

"What are you doing?" I heard Lightspot hiss.

"I'm here to get her." He signaled towards me.

"Why her?"

"Because I have some questions to ask her."

"Listen up kit! You'll have to go through us in order to get her!"

Did he just flinch when they called him a kit?

"That won't be too much of a problem, I've heard that your clan only specializes on attacking weak animals."

This time it was me that flinched.

Did he seriously just call me weak?

"Okay Stormclan, lets get him!"

They all charged at him from different angles and all he had to do was jump up and they ran into each other. They were going to fast to stop in time. He gripped into Grass-strike's pelt and raked his claws down his back. Once he finished up with them, he turned to me. Before he could speak, we heard battle cry's in the distance.

"Run!" He called to me as he sprinted towards the thicker forest.

I followed him out of curiosity on his questions for me. Once we were a safe distance away, we stopped to catch our breath.

"Is- is what you- what you said t-true?" He meowed, still catching his breath.

I flinched. "You think I lied?"

"Well you have to admit, it does sound like a lie."

My fur bristled as I glared at him.

"Look I didn't mean to offend you. It's just that I don't know how to word this." He meowed quietly.

I let my fur lie flat again, and I softened my gaze.

"One moment I was Cloudpaw, and dying then I woke up and the others were calling me Skykit."

I flinched again. The same thing had happened to me when I died for the first time. I thought I was the only one… I've never met someone who could do the same thing as me before.

"How did you die?" I asked him.

"I drowned."

"I see.. So both of us were reborn and both our first lives sucked… Or at least the deaths did…" I muttered to myself, but I think he heard me because he looked at me funny.

"Well I hope I helped, but I really have to go! Bye!" I meowed as I turned away from him. I ran off to find my den.

When I got to my den, I just simply laid down and fell asleep.

I was woken up by a bad dream. One that I haven't had in forever. It was my first life, It ended with me being killed while she sat there doing nothing but stare at me happily.

I walked out of my den and sat down by the pond.

Only one thing can be worse than that life, and that is what almost happened in this life.

I was staring off into space, lost in thought when someone startled me.

"What are you doing here?" she snarled.

I jumped, then turned around to see who was behind me.

"Flamewing calm down! She's just a kit!" Hissed a dark brown tabby tom.

"Brambletail go get Leopard! You're useless here anyways!" the cream she cat hissed.

"R-right."

"Excuse me, but even though I'm not from around here, shouldn't you be nicer to your friends." I meowed as calmly as I could.

"He's not my friend!" she growled at me.

"You might not consider him as your friend now, but if and when he dies, you'll be wishing that you were nicer to him!" I hissed back at her.

Flamewing flinched. "How would you know?"

"I know because I've been mean to someone, then watched him die before my eyes."

She was about to say something, when a cat with a leopard pattern came up behind her.

"Flamewing are you causing problems for this kit?" The leopard patterned she asked calmly.

Flamewing jumped. "Woah! when did you get here Leopardstar? I mean umm... I was just asking what she was doing here."

Does she think that I won't mention anything?

I started to force tears into my eyes by remembering my first life. I started to purposefully cry.

"S-she was picking on me!" I wailed and put my face into my paws.

I glanced up to see Leopardstar glaring at Flamewing.

"How many times do I have to tell you to stop picking on kits?" Leopardstar hissed.

"No, I wasn't picking on her, she was being really angry and defensive. Tell her Lionfrost!"

Leopardstar glanced at who I assume is Lionfrost.

"Is that true?"

"Uhhh…. No! Flamewing is lying!"

Leopardstar once again glared at Flamewing.

"And now you're lying to me, your leader?"

I had to stop myself from laughing.

"Flamewing go back to camp!" Leopardstar ordered. She turned back towards Lionfrost and I.

"I know that that was all a bluff, I just don't like her that much and I like messing with other clanmates. What's your name?"

"My name is Blue."

No matter how much it pains me, I will always go by my name from my first life.

"Well then Blue, would you like to join Iceclan?"

"Umm… Uhh…" I just can't make any friends. "Sure!"


	3. Pounce

I looked to the other cats around me. Patchpaw, the calico, was sitting with her best friend, Sandpaw. Sandpaw was a cream colored cat with brown ears and tail tip. On my other side was Blue. Blue looked like a fox, with a ginger pelt, and black ears, paws, and a white tail tip. Her pelt didn't even match her name. Everything seemed to be a mystery around her.

I hadn't spoken to her in the four moons after I saved her from Stormclan. Not that I hadn't tried. She was just really unapproachable. It didn't help that she left if you tried talking to her. Then was the few times she would speak, and scare you. That was funny.

I remember the first time perfectly.

* * *

I listened in to Flamewing, Lizzardleap, and Softnettle talk.

"I don't see why Leopardstar even let her in. We never have before!" Flamewing hissed so quietly that _maybe _Stormclan didn't hear her.

The other cream colored she-cat, Softnettle spoke in a whisper, "I don't know, Skykit was a rogue right?"

"So? He was in injured kit!" Flamewing hissed again.

Lizzardleap spoke for the first time, "Wasn't Blue injured?"

"Shh! Nevermind!"

They looked over to Blue, who was sitting a fox-length away.

"She's just so unapproachable!" Softnettle hissed softly.

"And she is rude!" Lizzardleap added.

"Not to mention, she just sits there!" Flamewing pointed out.

"And she is behind you!"

They all jumped to see Blue sitting behind them. Her tail was lashing in anger, but I could see that she was holding in a laugh at the same time.

"You talk!"

"You… you met me on the patrol… Duh, I talk…"

"I did?"

That was the funniest day of my life, or lives…

* * *

Now I sat here next to her. Leopardstar gave the call.

"All cats old enough to catch their own prey, please gather beneath the High-Stone!"

Most cats were already there, but the few others gathered at Leopard's call.

Speaking of which, wasn't Leopardstar the deputy before? What happened to Redstar? I wonder…

"I, Leopardstar, leader of Iceclan, call upon my warrior ancestors to look down on these apprentices. They have trained hard to understand the ways of your noble code, and I commend them to you as a warriors in their turn.

"Sandpaw, Patchpaw, do you promise to uphold the warrior code and to protect and defend your Clan, even at the cost of your life?"

Both she cats said, "I do,"

"Sandpaw, by the powers of StarClan, I give you your warrior name. Sandpaw, from this moment you will be known as Sandstrike. StarClan honors your energy and kindness, and we welcome you as a full warrior of Iceclan."

"Patchpaw, by the powers of StarClan, I give you your warrior name. Patchpaw, from this moment you will be known as Patchfur. StarClan honors your enthusiasm and thoughtfulness , and we welcome you as a full warrior of Iceclan."

The cats called out, "Sandstrike! Patchfur! Sandstrike! Patchfur! Sandstrike! Patchfur!"

Leopard let us call out a few times before raising her tail for silence.

"We have another ceremony today!"

Finally… I waited an extra moon for this…

"Skykit**, **you have reached the age of seven moons, and it is time for you to be apprenticed. From this day on, until you receive your warrior name, you will be known as Skypaw. Your mentor will be Leafnose. I hope Leafnose will pass down all she knows on to you."

"Leafnose, you are ready to take on an apprentice. You had received excellent training from Berrydash, and you have shown yourself to be loyal and kind. You will be the mentor of Skypaw, and I expect you to pass on all you know to Skypaw."

Her? Her! Couldn't have a gotten someone fun, or something!

I saw a few cats around me look at me with questioning looks, Blue struggling to hold in a laugh… I must have talked aloud… as long as Leaf-

Leaf is glaring at me… whoops..

"Anyways! Blue**, **you have reached the age of six moons, and it is time for you to be apprenticed. From this day on, until you receive your warrior name, you will be known as Bluepaw. Your mentor will be Stormclaw. I hope Stormclaw will pass down all he knows on to you."

"Stormclaw, you are ready to take on an apprentice. You had received excellent training from Rainheart, and you have shown yourself to be strong and smart. You will be the mentor of Bluepaw, and I expect you to pass on all you know to her."

She gets someone good! Come on!

Oh no…

Leafnose is glaring at me, while Blue and Storm are laughing…

I really need to learn to keep my mouth shut.

"Let's go training then!" Leaf hissed.

"Dismissed, I guess…" Leopard called from the High-stone.

I ran to the cliff guarding camp and started to climb.

Leaf looked at me oddly, "It's like you've done this before, Sky…"

"I have."

"What!?" Leaf and now Storm hissed, "Have you been sneaking out!?"

"I used to not have to," with that I jumped up the last of the cliff and sat in the clearing as Blue, and then Leaf and Storm came up behind me.

"Let's train separately," Storm suggested, already moving away.

"Wait! Don't leave me with _her_!"

"What was that?" Leaf hissed in my ear.

"I CAN HEAR YOU PERFECTLY FINE FROM OVER THERE THANK YOU VERY MUCH!" I yelled at her.

I walked to the other side of the clearing, angry. I know its me who's being a jerk, but still…

"Lets see your hunters crouch," Leaf said, sitting down.

I slipped into a perfect crouch, my paws near each other on the right side, so I would balance out.

"Thats wrong," Leaf pointed out.

"Really? Let me try it…"

I lined myself up to Leaf's left side, making it look like I would land next to her. However, with my unbalanced self, I knew where I would really land.

I pounced and landed on my target, Leaf. She grunted as my paws hit her back, but she didn't fall. Sadly, she took it as me missing.

"See, you missed your target. Your paws were lined up wrong."

"No, I hit my target, you, and my paws were obviously lined up right if I hit."

"You're saying you were trying to hit me!?" Leaf asked, startled.

"No, I'm saying the sky is orange!" I rolled my eyes, "Duh!"

Leaf stuttered, annoyed, surprised, and angered, "Th-the p-pounce was still wrong!"

"No thats what I was taught!" I yelled back, rage blinding me.

Leaf jumped, "Taught? When? By who? You were two moons when we found you!"

Very calmly I answered, "Yes, last time I was seven moons, and by Blackfrost. Speaking of which, I haven't seen him, where is he?"

"Y-you shouldn't k-know that n-name." Leaf stuttered.

"Why not?"

Leaf shook her head, "Back to camp, now!"

"But-"

"Now!"

Her golden fur was all fluffed up, and her blue eyes glaring.

"No."

With that I sat down, and watched as Leaf just left to request a mentor change. At least I hope.


	4. Training

**This chapter overlaps a little bit, but it still has new content thanks to Frostbite.**

Sky sat down next to me as Leopardstar called out to the clan.

"All cats old enough to catch their own prey, please gather beneath the High-Stone!"

Most cats were already there, but the few others gathered at Leopard's call.

I noticed Sky glance around a little, then look back up at Leopard.

"I, Leopardstar, leader of Iceclan, call upon my warrior ancestors to look down on these apprentices. They have trained hard to understand the ways of your noble code, and I commend them to you as a warriors in their turn."

"Sandpaw, Patchpaw, do you promise to uphold the warrior code and to protect and defend your Clan, even at the cost of your life?"

Both she cats said, "I do,"

"Sandpaw, by the powers of StarClan, I give you your warrior name. Sandpaw, from this moment you will be known as Sandstrike. StarClan honors your energy and kindness, and we welcome you as a full warrior of Iceclan."

"Patchpaw, by the powers of StarClan, I give you your warrior name. Patchpaw, from this moment you will be known as Patchfur. StarClan honors your enthusiasm and thoughtfulness, and we welcome you as a full warrior of Iceclan."

The cats called out, "Sandstrike! Patchfur! Sandstrike! Patchfur! Sandstrike! Patchfur!"

Leopard let us call out a few times before raising her tail for silence.

"We have another ceremony today!"

I feel bad for Sky.. He had to wait an extra moon because of me.. He said he was fine with it, but I don't think he was. I think he was just trying to be nice.

"Skykit, you have reached the age of seven moons, and it is time for you to be apprenticed. From this day on, until you receive your warrior name, you will be known as Skypaw. Your mentor will be Leafnose. I hope Leafnose will pass down all she knows on to you."

"Leafnose, you are ready to take on an apprentice. You had received excellent training from Berrydash, and you have shown yourself to be loyal and kind. You will be the mentor of Skypaw, and I expect you to pass on all you know to Skypaw."

"Her? Her! Couldn't have a gotten someone fun, or something!" Sky hissed. I don't think he meant to say that out loud.

The cats around us stared at him in shock as I tried really hard not to burst out laughing. It's funny when Sky fails.

Leaf is glaring at Sky from right next to the high stone. Its funny how Leaf isn't embarrassed by it, but she's just pissed off.

"Anyways! Blue, you have reached the age of six moons, and it is time for you to be apprenticed. From this day on, until you receive your warrior name, you will be known as Bluepaw. Your mentor will be Stormclaw. I hope Stormclaw will pass down all he knows on to you."

"Stormclaw, you are ready to take on an apprentice. You had received excellent training from Rainheart, and you have shown yourself to be strong and smart. You will be the mentor of Bluepaw, and I expect you to pass on all you know to her."

"She gets someone good! Come on!" Sky hissed again.

Leafnose is glaring at Sky. This time I couldn't hold in my laughter, apparently neither could Storm... We both burst out laughing.

"Let's go training then!" Leaf hissed.

"Dismissed, I guess…" Leopard called from the High-stone.

We ran to the cliff that led out of camp.

Leaf looked at Sky oddly, "It's like you've done this before, Sky…"

"I have." He meowed.

_Sky you idiot!_

"What!?" Leaf and now Storm hissed, "Have you been sneaking out!?"

"I used to not have to," with that he jumped up the last of the cliff and sat in the clearing waiting for me, Storm and Leaf.

"Let's train separately," Storm suggested, already moving away.

"Wait! Don't leave me with her!" Sky called over to me and Storm.

"What was that?" I heard Leaf hiss.

"I CAN HEAR YOU PERFECTLY FINE FROM OVER THERE THANK YOU VERY MUCH!" I heard Sky yell.

I stopped where I was to listen.

"Blue lets go train." Storm meowed.

"But this is more interesting!"

"I don't care, let's go battle train-"

"Okay!" I interrupted him.

Once we got to a spot that he was happy with, we started.

"Come at me." He instructed.

I didn't hesitate, if that's what he wants then that's what he gets.

I darted at him. I snaked to the side and darted at his legs. He jumped just before I got there and landed on my back.

He got off my back and I got up hissing and lashing my tail.

"You should think about eating less prey, Storm..."

He flinched. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"You weigh to much!"

"Whatever. Come at me again."

I kept on attacking him, but he always ended up either dodging, or pinning me.

"Don't give up, Blue. Come at me again."

"No. You come at me this time."

"Um okay..."

He started running at me then stopped. He was trying to make me flinch. I didn't, I wasn't even close to flinching. Then he darted at me for real. I jumped past him, then turned around and hooked my paw behind his legs and pulled his legs toward me. He fell face first. I jumped on his back and gripped my claws in. He tried rolling to get me off but I kept my claws in. After a while, he surrendered.

"Good job Blue! But next time keep your claws sheathed."

"But that's not fun!"

"I don't care. The medicine cats don't want to be curing me all the time."

"Do they ever want to cure you...?" I muttered.

Storm glared at me.

I walked down the cliff and back into camp.

**Please leave feedback and suggestions!**


	5. Leader

I should go back to camp. I already saw Blue and Storm leave the territory, but somehow I knew going down to camp wasn't a good idea.

I had made silly mistakes talking to Leaf like how I did. Not one cat other than Blue knew I wasn't Sky. I was Cloud. I would _never_ be Sky

I had to go back sometime. I could only hope Leaf wasn't my mentor anymore.

Then again, who would count as a good mentor?

I started to make my way down into camp, and already saw Leopardstar. This wasn't good. leaf is the deputy, but if the leader also got involved…

As I approached the camp, Leopardstar called me over.

Flamewing sneered at me, "Are you in trouble?"

I hit her in the face with my paw, and continued walking.

"Yes, Leopardstar?" I asked, knowing what's coming.

"Let's talk in my den, Leaf is there already." she hissed, already turning away.

I quickly followed her into the den, not wanting to fall behind. The den was small, but then again, only one cat ever slept here. I saw Leaf glaring at me like I killed someone. I only yelled at her!

"So," Leopard began, "Let's get down to business. How do you know Blackfrost?"

I was shocked, I thought this was about my behavior towards Leaf, not Blackfrost.

"He trained me," I answered truthfully.

"When?"

I couldn't tell them that...

"I can't say,"

"Why not?

"Because Blue-" I stopped, noticing my mistake. Sure Blue would want to kill me, but...

"How is Blue involved?" A confused Leaf asked.

"Because she isn't." I lied.

"But you just-"

"No I didn't."

Leopard glared at me, "Sky-"

"Cl-" I started to correct her but stopped.

"What?"

"Keep going,"

"What did you say?"

"I said," I moved closer to her ear and shouted, "KEEP GOING!"

"That's it Skypaw," Leopardstar hissed, "No training for a half-moon!,"

I couldn't help myself, "Not like I need it."

I walked out of the den to see a few cat looked at me weirdly.

"What?"

They almost all looked away at once. All but Flamewing. She carefully avoided Blue, who was sleeping, and came over to me.

I hissed before she could do anything, "Get away from me,"

"Why? Are you allergic too!?" She yelled at me.

"What?" I asked confused.

"Erm, nothing. So you got in trouble?"

"Yes, for looking at you,"

I pushed my way past her and laid down a fox length from Blue. Looking now, she was shaking. Why? Another of her mystery's? It was none of business anyways.

I could feel the edges do my vision fading as I drifted asleep.

If only I could wake up dead.

* * *

I woke up alive.

It was moonrise and the warriors were starting to go to their nests. Nearby I heard shouting.

"Why did you bring your prey over here? Are you trying to give it to me?" Blue yelled.

Flamewing hissed, "You looked like you needed it,"

Blue hissed back, "I'm glad your going on a diet, but I told you, I'm allergic to you!"

That explains that.

I made my way over to the cliff, but was stopped by a certain leader.

"What Leopardstar?" I growled, "You said I couldn't train for half a moon! I can go into the forest!"

"And now I say you can't go out in the forest!" she hissed.

This is... stupid.

"So what, your keeping me here like a prisoner?"

"No, like an apprentice that broke a rule,"

"What rule! The rule of talking? I didn't do anything!" I hissed.

Leopardstar slammed a paw onto the groud in rage, "You yelled at your leader and deputy!"

A small crowd was starting to form. Great. I bit down on my paw to stop myself from attacking the leader. That would be bad.

"What are you doing? Injuring yourself?"

I hissed, "What? Can I injure you instead?"

"That's it, one moon of no forest."

"How scary." I rolled my eyes, "What's next, two?"

"Sure, why not," Leopard hissed, thinking she was winning, "Now, go to your nest!"

"No." I meowed calmly, sitting down instead. I heard gasps.

"What was that!?"

"I said you need to hear better."

"Skypaw!"

"That's not-" I stopped.

"Not what? Your name? What is it then?" Leopardstar looked ready to kill me.

"Why do you care about my name? You never even said-" I know my limits. I can't talk about her. This has gone on long enough.

"Nevermind." I hissed, getting up, "Goodnight."

I pushed my way past the crowd. Getting to a corner of camp I laid down.

I can't think about her now.

No.

I'm not thinking about Rosekit...

Rosekit...

Does anyone even remember her?


	6. Why do you care?

I noticed Leopard walk over to Sky, she looked angry. I turned to Storm.

"What's going on?"

"Not sure, but I wouldn't go investigate if I were you. Leopard isn't one that you want to piss off."

"Okay."

I silently walked over to my usual spot at the edge of camp. Flamewing, Lizardleap and Oakdusk walked over to me.

"Did you have any trouble talking today during training?" Flamewing sneered.

"No, its battle training, not like you're going to have a conversation with someone while battling them."

"What about asking Storm questions when you fail?" Lizardleap chimed in.

"I probably didn't fail as much as you did when you were an apprentice."

"For your information, I was a perfect apprentice."

"You can't be a perfect apprentice. You wouldn't have known all the battle moves right away and you wouldn't have been able to get them down perfectly right away."

Lizardleaps tail was lashing now. She angrily stomped away with Oakdusk following her.

"I hope you didn't get hurt saying that much at once." Flamewing sneered.

"Why do you even care whether or not I talk?" I shouted at her.

"Oh I'm sorry, did I take you by surprise or ruin your ears?"

I started purposely sneezing and coughing. I didn't let myself stop until she started talking. Even though I got odd and concerned looks from the others around me.

"Why are you sneezing and coughing?" Flamewing asked.

"Sorry I need to leave, I'm allergic to idiots." I meowed as I got up and walked away. Some of the cats around me started laughing, Storm was one of them.

Flamewing walked away from where I was. I went and got some wet moss to clean her scent from there. When I finished I laid down and waited for Sky. Sometime while I was waiting, I fell asleep.

* * *

"Go ahead! Kill her! Get that trash out of my sight, Nettle!" She hissed.

I was staring up at her, that evil calico she. She was sitting there watching me get killed by him, and laughing. It made me angry, but I was too weak to move. I couldn't even dodge the attacks. Blow after blow, he sliced me open each time. Not once missing. Then, he killed me. He sliced my throat, over and over again. For three moons, I had been tortured by these cats. The cats I should have been able to trust.

Then, I was able to get up. I walked to past him and turned around. I gasped. When I turned around, I saw my body. Am I dead? I was because that's when she walked over to my body and started attacking it.

* * *

I woke up startled. Did I seriously just dream of my first life again? I sat up and glanced to my side. Sky was laying a fox-length away from me.

_Could he tell I was having a bad dream? Or does he actually_ _**care**_ _about me? No it's not possible. Nobody has ever cared about me and nobody ever will._


	7. Punishment Story

"Darkpounce, Amberear, and Lionfrost, borders. Pinewater and Sunbranch, hunting."

I ran over to the two patrols, eager, and maybe too hopeful. They stopped as I approached them.

"Yes, Skypaw?" Pinewater, a silver tom with darker brownish spots asked.

I quickly asked my question to the tom, "Can I come with?"

The tan she-cat, Sunbranch, shook her head, "Not allowed, Sky. Leaders orders."

I looked to the black tom, Darkpounce, who was leader of the other patrol.

"Same here Sky."

I sighed, my hope draining away from my soul. In a final attempt I looked to my mentor, Leaf.

"No Sky, I'm the deputy! I can't disobey Leopardstar!" she shook her head.

"Can't? Or won't?" I asked pointlessly.

"Both, now go do something."

I nodded, "I'll hunt!"

"No Sky!" they all yelled, "In camp!"

I made myself look confused, "There are no live prey in camp!"

"Sky…" Leaf warned.

"Fine," I mumbled walking away.

A few seconds later I heard a voice.

"Rejected much?"

I looked up to see a small calico looking at me. Next to her was a siamese.

"Hi Patch, Sand." I nodded, "What are you two doing?"

Sand spoke up, "Another hunting patrol! Our third today!"

Patch quickly added, "But if you want to do something with us, thats fine!"

I sighed, "Would you please? I'm bored…"

"Well what do you want to do?" Sand asked. It was a good question. There wasn't much to do in camp, we couldn't really battle train, and I didn't want to play a game. What did that leave?

"Can you tell me a story?" I asked. It was silly sure, but what else? And I need to know…

Patch looked at me funny, "You're not a kit, Sky."

"Does that ban me from stories?"

"No, but…"

"Then tell me one."

Sand and Patch looked to each other and sighed.

"Fine, but lets go somewhere, not in the middle of camp,"

We made our way to the corner of camp. It was under a small maple tree, with some moss nearby. We made ourselves comfortable.

"Any story in mind?" Patch asked. Yes, I did have one in mind.

"Yes, can you tell me about Cloudpaw?"

Patch and Sand seemed startled. At least I didn't tell them I am Cloudpaw, that would be bad.

"W-where did you hear about him?"

"I forgot," I lied, "I think I overheard a warrior or something..."

Or I am him, same difference.

"Well," Sand cocked her head, "Sure, I guess. It's not a real happy story though…"

"Thats fine."

"Well, you see… Cloudpaw was an apprentice of Iceclan. A perfectly regular apprentice, that was just a little shy. One day, Leopard, the deputy at the time, sent out a patrol just before a storm.

In the patrol, they all split up, and agreed to meet back just before the storm.

Everyone, but Cloudpaw meet back up. We think he drowned, but we never found a body."

I felt bad for asking them. I mean, I was there friend, and me dying… But I had to ask,

"Who is his family? Where are they now?"

Patch and Sand sighed.

"His father, Thrushstorm, left after his mother, Dappleshade died of greencough."

"Did I- he have any siblings?" _Say yes, say yes…_

"Not that I remember,"


	8. My Fourth First Battle

"Patrols! Blue, Storm Sky and me for border patrol. Tastycat, I mean Brambletail, and Flamewing for hunting!" Leaf called out.

We walked along the border, and marking it… Or at least Storm and Leaf were. I wasn't paying attention to anything anyone was doing. I was thinking about my dream, well actually it's a memory. I didn't think that I'd dream about it again. My thoughts were interrupted by growls. I looked up to be face to face with Stormclan.

_I feel bad for Storm. His name is part of that idiot clans name._

"This is Iceclan territory! Why are you on it?" Leaf growled at them.

"We are here to get our clanmate. The one that looks like a fox."

Leaf and Storm glanced at me questioningly.

"Actually I'm not your clanmate. I never agreed to join that dumb clan, I was forced. But I could've and should've left sooner, I mean what would you have done? Kill me?"

Leaf and Storm were definitely confused now, but I didn't care, Stormclan really pisses me off.

"Yes and if you'd like, we can kill you now!"

"I'd be fine with that! Then I could come back and have a real reason to kill you!"

"Umm… Blue? You wouldn't be able to kill them because you'd be dead." Leaf meowed.

"Yeah but only for a couple-" I cut myself off before finishing. "Nevermind, I don't need to finish saying that… You're probably confused as it is."

Leaf turned back to the Stormclan cats. "Get off Iceclan territory!" she hissed.

"No. Stormclan attack!"

"Iceclan attack!"

_I don't think it was necessary for her to give the command, what else would we do? Stand there and let them attack us?_

A white tom with grey stripes and blue eyes, I think his name is Snowjump or something like that, never payed much attention, attacked me. He ran at my legs. He didn't know it but tripping me wouldn't keep me down for long. He tripped me and I got up and attacked him immediately. I swiped my claws down his side. He turned around and jumped on my back, digging his claws deep into it. I sat still and wait for him to start scratching me rapidly When he did, I rolled over immediately. He let go of my back and I started scratching his belly, he yowled in pain and got up, running back to Stormclan. I sat back and waited for someone else to attack me and to see if anyone needed help. I watched the other Stormclan warriors retreat.

When we got back to camp everyone gasped, although I was too tired to do anything. So I just laid down where I was. Flamewing walked over to me.

"So you lost your first battle?"

"It's not my first."

"So you lost your first battle while being part of the clan?"

"No and get away from me! How many times do I have to tell you that I'm allergic to you?"

Sky walked over by me and Flamewing,"Flamewing, just so you know, we won the battle. All of us did. If you were on the patrol, we probably would have lost, or at least you would."

Flamewing growled and walked away. I turned to Sky who was now sitting next to me.

"Th-thanks."

He looked at me questioningly but didn't say anything. Its not my fault that he's the first one to actually help me.

_I don't know much about him, but I know that he might actually __**care **__about me. He'd be the first._


	9. Who are you really?

**We're back! We haven't been lazy, in fact, we've been writing! Sorry for the late upload, but we have typed up to chapter 43, and have plans for a ****sequel..****.**

**Anyways...**

I woke up quickly from a bad dream that I no longer remember. I felt warm fur against my back. Wait what? I slowly got up and looked to where my back was. Blue was sleeping there slightly shaking from the cold. I swear I fell asleep a foxlength away from her. Then again I swear I am a foxlength away from where I fell asleep. Did I move in my sleep? Oh no...

I quickly moved away, but quietly, so I wouldn't wake her. I looked around and saw Flamewing guarding, but that is it. No-one else was awake. Then again, it was just a bit after moonhigh.

No one would notice if I left camp again. I was lucky enough to get my way on a patrol the other day.

I made my way to the cliff of camp, but sadly Flamewing saw me.

"Where do you think you're going?" she hissed at me, coming closer.

"The forest." I cooly replied, "Unless its not up the cliff…"

"You're not allowed out of camp! Last time you lost a battle!"

"We won." I blinked my eyes at her.

She just hissed at me, "Leopard says-"

"I don't care what she says,"

"She's the leader!"

"And?"

Flamewing got right up to my face, "Are you going to-"

"Back away because this is a little close?" I finished, "Yes."

I backed away and slowly started up the cliff.

"I'm telling Leopardstar!"

"Are you going to be the one to wake her?"

I finished climbing up the cliff with ease. Slowly I made my way into my forest, and yes _my_ forest. The gentle breeze carried the scent of prey, but I wasn't going to hunt. I came here just to relax, and thats what I was going to do.

I walked aimlessly in the forest, taking in sights of birds, the scent of prey, the sound of that breeze, and the river.

I froze. The river. The river that _just had to flood_ and end my life. I knew it was irrational, but I felt afraid. Of what exactly, I don't know.

If I died now, would I be reborn with a new fear? Would I even be reborn at all?

I didn't know. Does Blue?

How many times has she died? What is she afraid of? Nothing I guess. It's like she died of just dropping dead and thats it. No fear.

Was she hiding something? Is she hiding everything?

Is she lying?

No, that one I can answer. No one would lie about dying.

But what isn't she telling?

Blue, who are you really?

With that, I feel asleep right then and there.


	10. It's Nothing

I woke up from the same dream again. This dream was starting to annoy me. Don't get me wrong, it scares me big time. I got up and went into the forest. I don't know why I like being away from anyone that could protect me. But maybe I do, maybe I don't want them getting close to me as much as I don't want to get close to them. When I got in the forest, I could hear Leopardstar yelling at someone.

"How'd you get out here? Wasn't Flamewing guarding?"

"Do you really think that _thing _could stop me?" I heard Sky hiss. "Now that's just an insult!"

I turned and went the other way. I walked until I got to the edge of the cliff. I sat there, looking at the land past the clans.

"Hello Breeze."

I stiffened at not only hearing _him_, but also hearing my name from this life.

"What do you want?" I growled without turning around.

"I think you know what I want."

"I was hoping for you wanting to kill me. Oh and my name isn't Breeze anymore."

"Okay what's your new name?"

"Blue."

"Okay _Blue _come with me and I might let you go when I'm done."

"I don't want to go with you!" I hissed, turning around to glare at him.

"It's not whether you want to or not. It's whether you and your friends want to live."

I froze. I didn't know whether or not to consider Iceclan as my friends, but I knew for a fact that I didn't want anything to happen to them. How will I get out of this without bringing danger to them?

He jumped forward and sliced my face. I could feel the blood oozing out of the wound. I ran over, and tripped him. Then turned around and sliced his belly. The battle lasted a while. Then he slammed me into a rock. I felt something snap. I yowled in pain. He slammed me into the rock again and again.

Then he was gone. I looked over and saw that Sky was battling him. I saw Sky get thrown into a tree, but he got back up and kept battling. A while later, Leopardstar came. When she came that's when he left. Sky was injured badly though. I tried to stand but it hurt to move.

Leopardstar ran to go get the medicine cats. It took a few minutes for them to show up. Sky made them start with my wounds.

"We need to turn you onto your other side now." Silveroak meowed calmly.

I nodded in response. They slowly helped me sit up. As they did, I yelped in pain. They rolled me onto my other side and started healing me again. When I was healed, I refused to have them bring me back until I knew that Sky was okay.

When we all went back to camp, the medicine cats brought me to my usual spot. Once they left, Flamewing came up to me.

"Now its obvious that you lost a battle."

"Yes I did. Nobody can win every battle. Sadly this is one that I can't end." It sounds like I was talking about her, but I was talking about the one that I hate more than anyone else, Dust.

I heard Leopardstar call to the clan.

"All cats old enough to catch their own prey, meet here beneath the Highstone!"

All the cats were already gathered, wondering what happened.

"As you can see, there was a battle. Blue was attacked and Sky helped Blue when she was about to lose. Stormclan has been getting more and more vicious, so be careful and go in the forest in groups of three or more. Not alone or with one other cat. Dismissed."

_It makes sense because when I was in Stormclan, I smelt him. So Dust is in Stormclan, instead of running away from him, I ran into his enemy clan. _

I was so lost in thought that I didn't notice Sky approach me.

"So who was that? The one that attacked you. He told me he knew you and that your battle wasn't my business."

I jumped. I slowly started shaking and I didn't know why.

"Its nothing. Or it's at least nothing I want to talk about."


	11. Is It Really?

I slowly approached Blue, who was staring off into space.

"So who was that? The one that attacked you. He told me he knew you and that your battle wasn't my business."

I saw her jump. She slowly started shaking. Why? Looking at her, I don't think she even knows.

"Its nothing. Or it's at least nothing I want to talk about." she started shaking even harder.

I shouldn't have spoke, but I did, "Nothing? Thats a lie and you know it,"

"Nothing I want to talk about," she repeated, slowly sitting back down.

"Blue, just tell me" I begged, "How bad even is it?"

"It's nothing!" she snapped glaring at me. I saw a few cats look our way, and Blue just ducked her head and ran off.

_Is it really that bad?_

"Wow-" I heard an annoying voice behind me.

"Not now, Flamewing!" I hissed, running off towards the other end of camp. I repeated the scene in my head.

* * *

Flashback

* * *

I saw a sandy brown tom jump at Blue, slicing her face.

"Blue!" I called, but I don't think they heard me. I was too far away, just barely being able to see them clearly.

Blue ran under his legs, tripping him. She turned around and sliced his belly. I heard Leopardstar calling for me.

"Skypaw! Get back here now!" she hissed from a while behind me.

"Why in Starclan's name would I do that!?" I yelled back. Turning back to run to Blue, I saw the sandy tom slam her into a rock nearby. I think I heard a yowl, but the blood in my ears drowned it out. To my surprise, he kept slamming her into the same rock, over and over again.

I was almost there. Letting out a battle cry, I slammed into the toms side. He quickly looked at me, glaring with his dark amber eyes.

"Who in Starclan are you?" I yelled at him, furious.

He hissed at me in a dusty voice, "This battle isn't your business; I'm here for Blue."

He turned and slammed my side, easily tipping me over. He grabbed my scruff and threw me into a tree. That snap wasn't my imagination, but for some reason, I felt nothing. I got back up and started attacking again.

His moves were unpredictable. He would attack from any angle, anywhere. At one point he went to attack Blue, but I jumped in the way.

"She's not battling, leave her out of this," I hissed using the last of my energy.

"Who said I wanted to battle her?"

Luckily, just as I collapsed, Leopardstar came. Took her long enough. The sandy brown tom gave her one look and left. He knew he would lose that fight, and maybe his life.

Leopardstar gave us a glance, "I'm getting the medicine cats."

I think she muttered, "Stupid, Stormclan." under her breath.

A few minutes later, Silveroak, Willowsong, and Echopaw, appeared with herbs. They started towards me, but I shook my head.

"Blue first."

"But-" Willow started.

"Blue first." I repeated myself.

Willowsong and Silveroak went over to Blue, while Echopaw handed them herbs, and slowly worked on me.

A few minutes later they were done.

"You both have broken ribs, Blue with three, Sky with one. What happened?"

Leopardstar sighed, "Stormclan."

* * *

End Flashback

* * *

I sighed. Something was off. I repeated the toms words in my head.

_This battle isn't your business; I'm here for Blue._

_Who said I wanted to battle her?_

If he didn't want to battle her, then what? Was he going to bring her to StormClan camp? Why?

This was all off…

===== POV CHANGE ===

A white tom with grey stripes was hissing at me.

"Why were you in Iceclan territory, Dustpaw?"

I hissed at the name, sure I was Dustpaw, but I wasn't young. I was older than most warriors here.

"Thats not your business, Snowleap." I answered back to the deputy.

His blue eyes glared at me, "Don't think Shadow won't know about this! We might end up in another war with Iceclan!"

"Don't you guys start all those wars in the first place?"

"Thats not the point, Dustpaw!"

I hissed at the tom, "The point is, my business isn't yours. Its personal."

"How can attacking Iceclan be personal?"

"It just is." I turned away. They would never understand. Breeze, or Blue, is basically related to me, even if not by blood.

Not right now.


	12. Just Give Up

I sat alone in the forest, thinking about reasons why Sky would care about who Dust was. The only reason I could come up with was that he actually cared about me, but that's impossible.

* * *

FLASHBACK

* * *

"Blue, who would you tell? Your parents don't listen to you." his evil voice meowed.

"Shut up! They'll listen this time! They have to!"

"That's where you're wrong. They'll probably think you picked a battle with a rogue."

"Dust shut up already! I used to think of you as a father but you're just as bad as them!"

"Blue, do you want me to wound you again?"

"Shut up! I hate you!"

He jumped forward and slammed me into the wall of the den. Then he slowly dragged his claws down along the side of my face.

* * *

END FLASHBACK

* * *

I should apologize to Sky for snapping at him, but I won't. I'm going to ask him to apologize to Iceclan for me. I made my way down the cliff and into camp.

Once I was in camp, I walked over to Sky.

"Sky, tell Iceclan I'm sorry for bringing them into my messed up life. I'm leaving now."

"Wait, what? You aren't leaving!" He shouted.

I started to shake slightly, wrong choice of words Sky. The other cats in camp looked in our direction.

"Blue you haven't messed up our lives! So don't leave!"

"I mess up everyone's lives. When I'm with someone, they always end up dead." I meow quietly, more to myself than to Sky.

"Says the one that nearly died herself."

"It would have been better if I died."

_Sky please let me leave, I need to do this._

"Blue none of Iceclan wants you to leave. I'm pretty sure that even Flamewing secretly likes you embarrassing her."

"You might not want me to leave, but I want to leave. If I stay you guys will only be in danger."

"Then I'm coming with you." Sky said, matter-of-factly.

I was shocked, "But then you would be in danger!"

"Of what, Blue?" Sky stared at me and whispered, "And we both know I don't care if I die."

"I can't tell you what." I say, staring at my paws and shaking a little.

"You don't have to, Blue," he said, with all of Iceclan staring at us now, "But, I'm still coming with."

"Sky…" I grumbled.

"Blue, you give this clan joy, everyone here loves it when you're here."

"Fine, I'll stay." I mutter, with tears in my eyes and I could feel my body shaking.


	13. Training Here and Training There

"Bluepaw, Skypaw," Leaf called, "Training today. Someone wake up Storm."

Blue walked over to her mentor, "TRAINING!" she shouted in his ear.

Storm jolted upright, "Who? What? Where?"

"Me, training, forest."

"OH!"

With that we made our way up the cliff. We stopped in a clearing a bit aways. Leaf looked ready to speak, and sadly, she did.

"Today we are partner training!" she shouted.

"We're right here…" I muttered, but she didn't hear me.

"We are most likely going to be attacking Stormclan soon, and we need to be ready."

"Storm and I will attack both of you, work together to beat us." Leaf and Storm got into position.

"Ready Blue?"

"I was going to ask you that."

Leaf pounced at me, so I tried hitting her belly mid-jump. I hit her belly, but as I started to fall back down, Storm hit me.

Luckily, Blue jumped in the fight. She got Storm not to pin me, and I stopped Leaf from pinning her. This cycle lasted a while. Attack. Dodge. Help. Repeat.

Wait, aren't our claws supposed to be sheathed? Wait, aren't our mentors claws supposed to be sheathed?

The fight didn't last too long after Blue slammed her mentor into a rock. It's pretty easy to pin a stunned Leaf.

With that, our training was over, but another was just beginning.

* * *

I started for the deputy. I made it look like I was trying to trip him, but right as he jumped to dodge, I also jumped, hitting his belly. From there, he was off balance and It was easy to pin him.

"Good job, Dustpaw," The white deputy, Snowleap, praised, "Now, go help Frostpaw. She's the youngest here."

I looked over to the four moon old kit. Here, she was old enough to train. I was to teach her how to fight in the expected battle. This was going to be fun.

"Frostpaw! Come here, now!" I called.

"Yes, Dustpaw!" she ran over to me on her slightly greyed paws, "What is it?"

"I'm going to teach you how to battle," her blue eyes widened in shock.

"B-but Berrypaw…"

"I don't care about your brother being hurt. Do you want to be able to protect him?"

"I-I guess…"

Berrypaw was an apprentice too, as he was Frostpaws brother. He had gotten injured battle training, and it might be fatal. Oh well.

"Dodge me, and you can see him."

"O-okay…"

I leapt at her striking her face.

"You call that a dodge?"

"I-I-I d-didn't realise w-we were s-starting…"

"Is the enemy going to tell you?" I glared at her.

"No- but-"

I slashed at her again.

"The enemy also won't let you talk,"

"But you were-"

I slashed at her side twice. The first time she fell and the second time she tried to jump. I hit her belly and she fell to the ground in pain.

I put a claw on her throat, "Boom, your dead."

I jumped at her and she just managed to move out of the way. I slashed at her face again.

"I-I dodged," she started, "Y-you said B-Berrypaw-"

"and I lied."

I slashed at her again and again, but she just sat there, not moving as blood pooled around her.

"You would be long dead by now, Frostpaw,"

She sat there, still not moving.

"You're a worthless apprentice anyways," I spat at her, walking away from the kit that was trying to hide her tears.


	14. Voices of My Past

**What?! It hasn't been a while... Totally... We have officially finished writing almost the entire the story though! Just not the sequel... We will be adding chapters more often now!**

Yesterday training was fun. I especially liked the fact that I got to wake Storm up and beat him up. I walked over by Sky next to the cliff leading out of camp. We waited for our mentors to be ready. Once they came over, we went up the cliff. Sky and Leaf went one way and Storm and I went another way.

When we got to where we were going to train, Storm looked at me and spoke.

"Is it okay if I don't hold back today?"

_Of course!_

But that's not what the voices in my head were telling me.

**Amber, you're too weak to beat him when he's not holding back!**

**If you lose a battle once, you'll never truly win again.**

**Breeze give it up! You'll never be able to fight back or dodge my attacks!**

_Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! I'll be fine!_

**Blue… You should die. You don't belong here!**

I jumped when I felt Storms tail resting on my shoulder.

"Blue, why are you shaking? If you want me to hold back I will."

"Don't. I must prove them wrong… I need to!"

"Blue I don't know what you're talking about."

"Nothing. It's just in my mind." _And was real in the past._ "Just don't hold back."

"Okay I won't, but if it becomes too much, tell me and I'll stop."

I nod, but I don't think it convinced him.

"Blue. I'm serious, if it becomes too much, you need to tell me."

"Okay, I will."

"Alright. Come at me."

I don't even start towards him, I just sit there. He jumps forward a little, trying to make me flinch. I don't, I just sit there staring at him. Waiting for him to come at me.

He charges straight at me, then swerves around to my side and trips me, I get up immediately and swipe my paw at him, hitting his face. Before we left camp, he had told me to keep my claws sheathed today, so I did. I jumped into the bushes behind me, and he warily looked around for me. I quickly and quietly climbed a tree. When he was just below the branch I was sitting on, I jumped down, onto his back. He yowled in shock. I jumped off his back and hit his face again.

**You call that a hit?**

I flinched. For the first time in forever I literally flinched.

**You're weak.**

I already knew that, I don't need voices to tell me that.

**Ouch, that hurt. As if.**

Of course it didn't hurt, my claws were sheathed.

**Blue, stop fighting back. You deserve what's coming.**

I'm pretty sure I stopped breathing for a second. I could tell I was shaking because I saw a worried look on Storms face.

"Blue what's wrong? That was a good move."

**Its a lie.**

This time I screamed out loud…

"Shut up!"

"B-blue?" Storm looked at me, shocked, "S-sorry, it was a c-compliment…"

"Not you." tears were in my eyes now.

"Blue?" Storm started, "Wanna go back to camp early?"

"Can I just have some time alone?" I whimpered.

"S-sure, Blue." Storm looked puzzled, "I'll be at camp,"

"Thanks."

I could feel the tears rolling down my face now.

**Crying shows weakness.**

"Shut up! I know I'm weak!"

**Do you want Violet hurt instead?**

"No! Shut up already!"

I heard pawsteps running toward me and turned my head. It was only Sky and Leaf. There were still tears in my eyes. Tears I didn't want anyone to see.

"Are you okay, Blue?" Leaf asked. Sky sat there, his head turned in confusion.

"I-I'm fine." I only half whispered.

"Let's go back to camp," Leaf muttered, "You can get some prey and rest there. Okay?"

"O-okay." I whispered, getting up and walking towards the cliff to get into camp.

**I'll find you, Breeze.**

I just shake my head. "I wish that you didn't" I whisper.

Leaf looked at me, "We're here, Blue. Go get some rest, okay? Battle tomorrow."

I nod and slowly walk over to my usual spot at the edge of camp. I lay down, resting my head on my paws. I replay what had happened in my head, over and over again. Before I fall asleep, I hear one last voice.

**Breeze, you are worthless. Even your parents hate you so much that they want to kill you.**

I'm pretty sure I cried myself to sleep.


	15. Battle Away Fear

**I know these chapters are short. Hopefully in the sequel, they will be longer :-)**

Yesterday training was funny. I especially liked when Blue got to wake Storm up and beat him up. Blue walked over by me next to the cliff leading out of camp. We waited for our mentors to be ready. Once they came over, we climbed up the cliff. Blue and Storm went the other way then me and Leaf.

This path looked familiar…

"Where are we going?" I asked my mentor.

Leaf chuckled, "You'll see when we get there."

I think I can hear it. Please, no. Not here. Anywhere but-

"We're here! The river!" she meowed cheerfully.

I panicked. Why is she being so cheerful!?

"W-what are we d-doing here?" I asked, shaking.

Leaf looked at me funny, "You need to learn to swim."

"No!" I ran behind Leaf, hiding from both her and the water of doom.

"Skypaw…" she turned around, trying to catch me. I ran around her again. Sadly, said water was on this side. I ran back.

"Stop moving!"

"No!" I backed away from her.

Leaf managed to grab my scruff.

No, no, no…

She turned me towards the water. I curled up hanging from her jaws. She dropped me.

"Explain this behavior, Skypaw" Leaf said, confused, "Are you afraid of water?"

"Pht. No…" I lied, turning my head.

How did she know? Oh, wait…

"Sky, thats a lie,"

"Pht. No…" I repeated.

"Skypaw!" Leaf meowed, "Why didn't you say so?"

"Because I'm not afraid of w-water…"

"Okay, ready to swim?"

"NO!" I yelled, then paused, "Okay, so I might have a small fear…"

"Small?"

"Averagely big…"

"Sky…"

I hissed, "I just don't want to die-" again.

"You won't die! Its very rare that-"

"Not really," or my luck is awful...

"What?"

"Bye!" I turned leaving. Leaf chasing me.

"Fine, but there is a battle tomorrow."

"Okay,"

We ran back the way we came. I think I heard Blue.

"No! Shut up already!"

Leaf muttered, "What is Storm telling her?"

We ran back to camp. Storm approached us, "Back already?"

Wait…

"Aren't you with Blue…?"

"Does it look like it?"

Leaf and I ran back towards where we thought both of them were. There we saw a cat with russet fur and black paws and ears sitting there, crying?

"Are you okay, Blue?" Leaf asked. I sat there, head turned in confusion.

"I-I'm fine." she only whispered.

"Let's go back to camp," Leaf muttered, "You can get some prey and rest there. Okay?"

"O-okay." Blue whispered again, getting up. We started walking towards the cliff to get into camp.

Blue whispered something and shook her head.

"We're here, Blue. Go get some rest, okay? Battle tomorrow."

I followed Blue over to her usual spot, and laid right there next to her. I don't think she knew I was there.

I heard her cries as we both fell asleep.

* * *

Leopard called from the highstone,

"Stormclan has been attacking more and more, not to say more viciously. As you most likely already know, we are going to attack the camp." she paused, "The following Iceclan members are going.."

"The front patrol is: Me, Littleshade, Brambletail, Sharpslash, Flamewing, Patchfur, Sandstike, Lionfrost, Darkpounce, Lizardleap."

"The backup patrol is: Leaf, Stormclaw, your apprentices, Sunbranch, Amberear, Minnowheart, Nettlebelly, Oakdusk, Pinewater."

"Okay?"

We all nodded or cheered. I was on backup patrol. Ugh.

The first patrol left, leaving only a handful of warriors.

Leaf called to us, "We're going to go in the bushes nearby, and wait to see if they need help."

They probably do.

A few minutes later we were, in a way, spying on Stormclan. It didn't last long. Soon Leopard got pinned by someone I couldn't see.

"Attack!" Leaf yowled as we all jumped into the battle.

I made my way around the edge of the battle, only fighting when a warrior came towards me, or if they looked weak. The whole big battle was a little much for me. I saw Blue doing something similar.

All of a sudden I felt bites on my legs and I fell. In front of me was a white kit, hissing. I couldn't help but mutter.

"A kit? In a battle?"

"I am an apprentice!" the white kit hissed, slashing me with a light grey paw.

It didn't hurt.

"You shouldn't be in a battle; you're too young."

"NO! I have to protect him!" the kit hissed.

I was confused,

"Is someone hurt?"

"M-my brother." the kit looked to her paws.

Just as I was going to talk, I got hit in the side by two fighting cats. Leopardstar and Shadowstar.

But up close, Shadowstar looked familiar… too familiar…

It couldn't be.

I felt my legs give away as I stared at my old mentor.


End file.
